Balance is overrated

Another night out, this time tutoring. In two hours, I have paid for three days of childcare. But what really is the cost?

I would rather make less easy money to make money that is more meaningful to my everyday existence. And that doesn’t require me to go out 8-10 p.m.

But I also value connecting with students who have such different lives and yet who are still just students trying to make meaning.

Really, there are so many things I enjoy, I keep wondering when I will have the time to get good at any one thing. Lately I’ve been looking back and found evidence that I’ve had a challenged relationship to “time” and commitment since at least the seventh grade when I would practice for my flute lesson literally on the way to the lesson.

So it’s not just a recent phenomenon, this taking on of many things. I can’t just blame the internet. It’s been with me at least since puberty.

Just how will my children think about the gift of each moment they get to walk on this planet? Will they revel in each breath or rue insufficient resources?

Balance

When does it become
more precarious than precocious
to stack things besides blocks,
to let random objects perch
slightly askew
because you can
for a while
even if you know
they might fall
spectacularly?

————

After casting aside my poetry hat for far too long, my NaBloPoMo plan is to write a poem — and to take and post a photo — every day in November, spending less than half an hour on both. The hope is to drill down, to focus, to look for and create beauty.

Day 1: Eleven One

Day 2: Shoreline

Day 3: Damage

Day 4: On Parenting and Sunrises

Day 5: When will we?

Day 6: Voting Line

Day 7: What I want my children to learn from me

Day 8: Haiku

Day 9: Reminders

Day 10: Routine

Day 11: Lux Esto, in moderation

Day 12: Family Photo Shoot at (nearly) 4o